How one Little Rock dad is helping new fathers find their place in the club.
Written by Jessica Crenshaw
Photographs by Brian Chilson
Settled in a bright corner in the Hillary Rodham Clinton Children’s Library, Dad Doula Kelvin Parker shares his plans for Father’s Day. “Father’s Day is time to myself,” he says. “My wife gets Mother’s Day, I get Father’s Day. We take the kids away from the person of the day, right? So it gives you some space,” he explains then laughs, “I’m ready!” Kelvin is a dad and husband. A former insurance professional turned nonprofit champion, he recently added the title of Dad Doula to his skillset, and that’s what we met at the library to talk about.
Most folks know what a doula is thanks to the maternal health conversations going on in the state. (Maternal health is a hot topic in Arkansas because we are the only state that doesn’t offer postpartum Medicaid to new mothers.) For those that don’t know, a doula is a trained professional who provides physical, emotional, and informational support for pregnant women before and after childbirth.
Up until now, for me, the term “doula” conjured only feminine images. I was curious when I heard there was such a thing as a “Dad Doula,” and when I found out there was one in Arkansas, I knew I had to talk to him. “A Dad Doula makes a lot of sense, a lot of sense,” Kelvin says. “When I heard of it, I was like, ‘Wow!’” He was intrigued and thanks to his background working with kids, he says the move to become a doula was “inevitable.”
When I ask him point blank, Kelvin explains to me that “a Dad Doula does the same thing as a lady doula.” He says a male doula can provide the same services, but he can also work exclusively with dads. “Guys need support around that time as well.” As a doula, Kelvin is there for new parents to help develop their birth plan and provide care during the birthing process. “I’m there for them, a listening ear. I walk them through the steps and let them know what’s going to be going on.”
Kelvin’s involvement and assistance during the actual birth is dependent on the family he is working with. “I don’t have to be in the waiting room or in active labor with the family.” He can provide support through Zoom or FaceTime, depending on his client families and what they need, since each family is different.
A doula provides support through the entire childbirth experience, but for Kelvin the most important work comes after the baby is born. He says in Arkansas, because pregnancy-related Medicaid coverage may end just 60 days after birth, families can lose access to vital resources like doula care when they need them most. “When postpartum Medicaid is available,” Kelvin explains, “mothers receive guidance with breastfeeding, newborn care, emotional wellness, and recovery, while partners gain support and confidence in their parenting roles. Access to these services leads to healthier mothers, stronger family bonds, and better outcomes for babies.”
Kelvin is a member of Arkansas Advocates for Children and Families statewide coalition working to improve maternal outcomes in Arkansas. He says the postpartum period is often called the fourth trimester and, “is a critical time for a mother’s physical recovery, mental health, and family adjustment.”
Daily life after the baby is born is often a shocking change for parents. “Postpartum is where it really kicks in,” he says. “The postpartum not knowing what to do, just being a new dad lump on a log,” he laughs. “Fathers don’t know what to do!” This is where a Dad Doula helps.“Think about it, if a father already knew what to do to help, that would be less stressful to mom.”
Kelvin completed a breastfeeding class because he wanted to learn more about how dads can support new moms through that experience. Often, he says, a new dad is clueless through no fault of their own and just needs some guidance to get it right. “The more the father knows, the smoother the process.”
“Fathers can nurture their baby. Fathers can put their baby to sleep. Fathers can change their baby.”
Kelvin says that parenting duties aren’t as divided by gender lines as in generations past. “Why, why are we putting feminine and masculine on it?” he asks. “Women are sustaining households and men have to pick up more of the supporting role.” He says being a parent is more about who can help at any given time. “It is gender neutral. This is stuff everybody needs to know.”
He credits his children with shifting his work trajectory. “My kids changed my entire outlook on my career. Like that!” He snaps his fingers to demonstrate the instant impact. Before becoming a father, Kelvin’s professional life revolved around the private sector. “I was an Allstate agent for 10 years,” he says in amazement, nodding to emphasize the number of years. “I had my first child and it changed everything. I decided to shut down the agency and open up a nonprofit serving the community.” He started Giving Others Ambition Together (G.O.A.T.), an organization focused on mentoring children and youth.
Helping kids was a good way to spend more time with his own.
It began with an after-school summer program and then, “I started shaking the right hands, meeting the right people.” He was introduced to Zenobia Harris at the Arkansas Birthing Project. “One day she asked me, ‘Do you ever think that you can mentor fathers the way you mentor kids?’ She took me under her wing and it took off from there.”
His work mentoring kids naturally led to working with their fathers. “At first, Arkansas Father’s Club was just a group of men meeting monthly.” But the club grew naturally. “Us dads were talking and sharing problems and things that we’re going through on the daily,” he says.
The group really took form after Kelvin connected with the Arkansas Birthing Project and he added curriculum by 24/7 Dad, a nationally recognized, evidence-based fatherhood program developed by the National Fatherhood Initiative. “We offer three components. We have a new fathers course, monthly meetings, and our big brother mentorships.” The mentorship program pairs experienced dads with new dads and is an ongoing piece of the Father’s Club. Kelvin says he averages about 35 men in the program and usually a dozen dads on the monthly call.
Dads are often overlooked when it comes to baby preparation.
Through the Arkansas Father’s Club, Kelvin outfits men with what they need to get the dad job done. “Our Daddy Bags include diapers, wipes, a portable changing station, and those little squishy things for the nose to get the boogers out,” he laughs. “We like sending guys off with something cause you know, women go all the time to these places and get different bottles, and they get diapers and all this stuff fathers never come home with.” Kelvin says it’s important to send men out into fatherhood with materials to help them succeed. It’s empowering and encourages them to take an active role in family life.
Kelvin says his work with families has made him a better dad. “My kids are 12 and 13 now, so they can see me being an active father. They see me meeting and talking with these dads and it’s just making them better humans overall. That makes me a better dad. You don’t have to teach them because they’re watching and they’re observing.”
Dad Doula Kelvin Parker is currently accepting clients and the Arkansas Father’s Club always welcomes new members. Follow them on Facebook and get plugged into the Club by filling out this form. If you want to talk to Kelvin about his Dad Doula services, send him an email at go********@***il.com, text or call (501) 551-5403.
3 Ways to Show Up: Fathering Advice From a Dad Doula
- Support mom before the baby arrives. Rub her back. Rub her feet. Get her to appointments. Pick up her meds. Be a chauffeur. Be present. Support starts the moment you know she’s pregnant.
- Learn everything. Take a breastfeeding class. Know what a mislatch looks like. Recognize postpartum depression. Your partner shouldn’t have to manage you and the baby.
- Don’t wait until the baby can walk. You can nurture a newborn. You can put a baby to sleep. You can change a diaper. The sooner you get your hands dirty, the better for everyone.
Jessica Crenshaw serves as Editor in Chief and Director of Programming at Arkansas Strong. She enjoys writing about interesting people and beautiful places in her home state. She was the Independence County 4-H BB Gun Champion in 1988 and at the age of 12 was awarded a Grand Champion prize at the Independence County Fair for her cornbread-making skills.
Award-winning photojournalist Brian Chilson received his degree in Journalism from Webster University.. He’s photographed in venues all over the state, capturing snapshots of high-profile acts like Justin Bieber and lesser-known talents like Valerie June. He is in courthouses, legislative committee rooms, and on the sidelines in football stadiums. He was in the streets during the protests following the murder of George Floyd and in hospital wards during the onset of COVID-19.
